Many of us grew up with an ideal that we labeled “The American Dream.” It signified a whole group of Shoulds that promised to bring us great rewards.
In essence, it said we all should:
- Find a good job and work hard.
- Get married, buy a house and have 2.4 children.
- Play by the rules.
- Don’t take risks.
- Save and invest for the future.
- Be serious, be responsible, and stay focused on getting ahead.
The promised reward, after many years of diligent work, was a secure, carefree, and fun retirement. Travel, fishing, freedom, grandchildren, and lots of time to enjoy all the things we missed while being responsible.
Most of us now realize that, for the most part, this dream is only experienced by a lucky few. We’ve learned that waiting until we retire to enjoy the “good life” is no longer satisfying. And we are beginning to incorporate the things we enjoy into our daily lives - including our work - instead of waiting and hoping we will get to enjoy those things later.
The American Dream is an example of beliefs that we, as a culture, have been taught to accept as truth, even though they really don’t apply to - or work for - most people. Yet, we continue to believe in them, and follow the rules mandated by them.
What about you? Are there Shoulds you are working toward and using as a basis for making decisions that may not be true - or right - for you? Have your Shoulds become long-standing habits that are hindering you rather than helping you?
With this in mind, let’s go back to the list of Shoulds you made on Monday (click here if you missed that one).
For each of these Shoulds, ask yourself, “Is that really true for me?” or “Is that still true for me?”
If not, is this a belief that you want to hold on to? Does it help you move forward, or does it limit your choices? Are the pros of holding on to it greater than the cons?
Whittle your list down to include only those beliefs that are probably hindering you more than helping you.
Now, is there some way you can modify these beliefs so that they will serve you better right now?
We’ll go a little further with this tomorrow…
Just Imagine That!
