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Archive for category Awareness Fuel
This week we have been increasing our awareness about our long-standing beliefs and how they influence the way we live our lives.
To recap - many of our beliefs became a part of who we are at a very young age. They usually operate behind the scenes at a subconscious level and show up as things we feel we should or should not do. These Shoulds become very strong influences when we decide to step out and try new things and behaviors.
We initially adopted our Shoulds because they were accepted guidelines that were supposed to help us live a “good life.” This was all well and good for “then.”
But, what about now?
As you have grown and changed – and as the world around you has changed (dramatically, I might add!)– some of those beliefs have become roadblocks that can stop you from creating the success and life that you want.
In fact, when you are very determined that you want to accomplish something – and you just can’t quite seem to make headway in that direction, this is a clue that a Should is operating in the background!
Now, if you see a Should as an immovable force in your life…it actually becomes an excuse that you use to hold yourself back.
Here’s another way to look at this…Is it possible that believing that you will always be a certain way because you have always been that way, has become an excuse for not going for what you want?
If you feel this is possible, and if you want to make quicker and easier progress in creating success, it is important that you change your thinking so that you can let go of your excuses. One way to do this is to modify your beliefs and your Shoulds so that they serve you better right now.
We began to work on this yesterday by suggesting you take a conscious look at some of the Shoulds you have become aware of this week and asking, “Is this belief still true for me and who I am now?”
Did you find that some of your Shoulds no longer make logical sense when you consider who you are and what you want to do now? If you did, you can begin to loosen your grip on this belief by restating it in a way that puts some space between the past – when you adopted this belief – and the present.
Here’s an example that will show you how to do this.
Say you have the following belief: “I am not good at math.”
Now see how this next statement feels: “Until recently, I was not good at math.”
Doesn’t that feel tons better? By adding “Until recently…” to the beginning of any belief that no longer serves you, you move that old belief into the past, opening the door to experiencing it’s opposite in the present! Pretty cool, huh?
Give this a try whenever you think or say a negative statement about yourself. Just say or think it again adding until recently to the beginning of the statement.
When you approach a Should with a new “now” perspective, you create possibilities. You begin to lift the weight off that belief and feel energized by the possibility that you can now do something to move forward!
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Perspective, Possibility Exercise
Many of us grew up with an ideal that we labeled “The American Dream.” It signified a whole group of Shoulds that promised to bring us great rewards.
In essence, it said we all should:
- Find a good job and work hard.
- Get married, buy a house and have 2.4 children.
- Play by the rules.
- Don’t take risks.
- Save and invest for the future.
- Be serious, be responsible, and stay focused on getting ahead.
The promised reward, after many years of diligent work, was a secure, carefree, and fun retirement. Travel, fishing, freedom, grandchildren, and lots of time to enjoy all the things we missed while being responsible.
Most of us now realize that, for the most part, this dream is only experienced by a lucky few. We’ve learned that waiting until we retire to enjoy the “good life” is no longer satisfying. And we are beginning to incorporate the things we enjoy into our daily lives - including our work - instead of waiting and hoping we will get to enjoy those things later.
The American Dream is an example of beliefs that we, as a culture, have been taught to accept as truth, even though they really don’t apply to - or work for - most people. Yet, we continue to believe in them, and follow the rules mandated by them.
What about you? Are there Shoulds you are working toward and using as a basis for making decisions that may not be true - or right - for you? Have your Shoulds become long-standing habits that are hindering you rather than helping you?
With this in mind, let’s go back to the list of Shoulds you made on Monday (click here if you missed that one).
For each of these Shoulds, ask yourself, “Is that really true for me?” or “Is that still true for me?”
If not, is this a belief that you want to hold on to? Does it help you move forward, or does it limit your choices? Are the pros of holding on to it greater than the cons?
Whittle your list down to include only those beliefs that are probably hindering you more than helping you.
Now, is there some way you can modify these beliefs so that they will serve you better right now?
We’ll go a little further with this tomorrow…
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Awareness Exercise, Perspective
In our last Grease for the Gears, we introduced you to the Shoulds - the beliefs we have about what we should or should not do. Today we are going to look at a great way to evaluate our Shoulds to see if they serve us or not.
First, let’s talk a little more about Shoulds and where they come from. Shoulds are not inherently good or bad. Actually they can make our lives much more manageable by sorting information and making certain decisions for us without taking up our conscious thinking time that we need for other activities.
Yet, Shoulds can also sneak up on us. Because they are beliefs we have “adopted” and they are primarily unconscious, they often function as an internal autopilot that determines our direction and actions without us being aware of it.
Hmmm…. this makes me wonder. How much of what we do on a daily basis is determined by our Shoulds? And how do we know when we are operating on our Should autopilot?
Actually, it is easier than you think! Even though our Shoulds are mostly unconscious, they are also very literal! To become aware when you are under the influence of a Should, listen to what you say and what you are thinking. If we listen, Shoulds clearly identify themselves by actually using the word should or shouldn’t in their instructions to us.
Now, here’s how you can use the literal nature of the Shoulds to help you evaluate them and determine if any particular Should serves you and matches up with who you are here and now.
When you hear yourself saying (or thinking) I should or I shouldn’t… STOP and ask yourself this question…
“Whose voice is that anyway?”
Why is this a good question? Somewhere, sometime, someone taught you this Should. They probably said this Should over and over to you– essentially downloading their beliefs from their autopilot to yours.
But, what worked for them may be holding you back from living your definition of success.
Once you identify a Should, you can decide if it reflects your voice – or somebody else’s.
When you evaluate what’s in your autopilot and consciously choose your beliefs, you will be amazed at how what you prefer to create and your results line up much more quickly and easily.
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness Exercise
This past weekend served as a reminder to many of us of where we started, and how far we’ve come. Not just as a nation, but also as individuals.
We’ve come a long way - especially these past few years!
We’ve overcome many obstacles, streamlined our perspectives and priorities, and gained a clearer picture of what we intend to accomplish in our lifetime.
We’ve created amazing tools to help us be more productive, and learned how to use old ones in new ways.
We are nothing if not adaptable and innovative!
And, for many of us, we’ve come to a point where we’ve done most of the obvious things, acquired most of the necessary skills, and created most of the required habits for success.
Yet it hasn’t become as easy as we’d like.
We’re just not quite there yet.
So what’s left to do - or to learn?
Perhaps it’s time to look a little closer at some of the beliefs and habits that are the basis from which we operate.
We call these the “Shoulds.” We learn them from the time we can talk - from the people we respect. And they learned them the same way.
We should work hard…
We should be responsible…
We should not rock the boat…
We should act our age…
We should set a good example…
The list could go on for volumes, and get very specific. These beliefs are ingrained in us, and they play a part in every decision we make.
Many of them are very helpful to us, and truly reflect how we want to be.
There are some, however, that we accept without question and continue to operate from even when they become hindrances.
We’ve been reading Dr. Wayne Dyer’s new book, Excuses Begone!, which explains with great clarity how and why we adopt these beliefs, and how they can hold us back.
His methodology for examining and potentially changing them is very closely aligned with the Just Imagine That program.
In order to take a new, imaginative idea from inspiration to practical reality, we necessarily pass it through our Shoulds to make sure it aligns with them.
It only makes sense, then, that if we’re holding on to Shoulds that are not really in line with us as individuals, we will not get the results that work best for us.
Take just a few minutes to think about some of your Shoulds. Make a list of some of them that might not be true for you right now, even though they may have been in the past - and they may be for other people you know.
Just list some possibilities. We’re not suggesting you throw them out just yet…just consider if they are really in line with who you want to be, and what you want to accomplish.
We’ll look at the some ways to evaluate them later in the week.
Perhaps you Should. 
Just Imagine That!
P.S. If you’re in the Atlanta area, Diana is co-facilitating an interactive workshop based on Wayne Dyer’s book each Tuesday this month at the InterFaith Truth Center. Please consider joining us as we use his principles and methodology in working through our interference!
Tags: Awareness, Perspective, Preference
We’ve been talking about Noise this week - external and internal noise.
We talked about the challenges of being heard by your prospective clients above the noise.
Today, let’s talk about the challenges of hearing yourself above the noise.
In this noisy and busy world, we have become almost constant communicators. We spend much of our time either speaking, writing, listening and reading. We are surrounded by words from many sources.
Let me say here that I LOVE words! I love finding just the right ones to express exactly what I feel. I love word games…well, you get the point.
Words are wonderful!
However.
Sometimes they get in the way.
Since they are really symbols of things, they require translation. The word “happy” is not happiness, but just a symbol of that state of mind. When you hear someone say “I’m happy,” you must translate that into your understanding of the feeling they are expressing. Of course this happens automatically, and very quickly, and you don’t really notice the effort it takes.
It does take mental effort, however.
If, on the other hand, someone looks at you with a huge smile, you get the same information - and probably more - in a much more direct way. You immediately understand, and even feel, their emotion without translation.
When we take words out of the communication, we recieve it more directly - and with less effort.
You may know this, and can probably think of examples very easily.
What you may not know, is what we have discovered in our Imagination Lab. Many of our exercises are done in silence. And the result is a truly amazing increase in the creativity and clarity that partipants experience.
Even in group activities which require the participants to communicate with each other, such as preparing a meal together, become totally new experiences when words are not allowed.
Creativity increases dramatically - and, almost as a bonus, it’s also more fun!
The next time you are playing with your imagination, or looking to inspire creativity (especially with someone else or a group), try it without words. You might be surprised at the results!
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Awareness Exercise, Imagination
Here in the US we are getting ready to celebrate the Fourth of July - Independence Day - the noisiest of all of our holidays. July Fourth is all about celebrating with loud marching music, firecrackers and fireworks as from coast to coast people gather together and honor the “founding” of the United State of America.
July Fourth is a great example of what can happen when a group of people is committed to an innovative idea. Back in 1776, the founding fathers were willing to be different. They were willing to take an idea and turn it into something real. And, most important, they were willing to take a stand for something they believed in.
And, because of this, they stood out from the crowd. They are remembered for their courage, determination and dedication. And they began a movement that changed the world as they knew it at the time.
So, how does this apply to you and rising above the Noise Factor? Well, I believe one of the keys to the founding fathers’ success is that they not only took actions, they took those actions based on a strong foundation made of bottom-line beliefs, like freedom, independence and basic human rights.
And when you have a solid foundation to stand on, choices about directions, priorities, and actions are easier to make.
So, what do you take a stand for? What is the foundation on which you have built your business? As you think about how your business offer is unique and how you can express that uniqueness, is there a basic ideal or vision that guides you?
Today, let’s take a look at your business foundation. Instead of thinking of actions you can take to stand out from the Noise Factor, let’s look at what you are actually taking a stand for.
First, read the following sentence and fill in the blank with the first thing that pops into your head.
Through my business, I _________________________________________.
Is what you put in the blank something that you believe in strongly? Is this really the foundation for your business? Or is it something you have adopted in response to today’s business climate and/or because of what others are doing?
Now, think about what you really want to take a stand for. What is it that you want your clients and customers to “get” about you and your business?
Sit with this for a moment. Then fill in the blank in the following sentence.
Through my business, I take a stand for ___________________________.
Every once in a while during the next several days, read this second sentence. Does it communicate what you want to give your clients and customers? Does it feel “good” to you? Can you easily relate this statement to what you are doing in your business?
If so, then this foundation is serving you right now for where you are in your business. And, as with all things, it may change as you and your business grow and evolve.
One more really cool thing…
When you consistently focus on the foundation on which your business stands, you naturally express those values in your dealings with other people, decisions are easier to make, and you get better results.
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Awareness Exercise, Priority
One of the most popular myths we hold about buisness is that competitors are the enemy, and that marketing is a battle with them ~ one that we must win in order to be successful.
Traditional marketing is full of techniques to do just that.
That view is based on the belief that there aren’t enough clients to go around, and that we must be the biggest and best in our field.
After all, we’re taught from early childhood that being number one is all that matters. There’s no glory in second place. That’s a whole other subject, but it does explain why we have the mindset around competitors.
We have a bit different perspective, however. And it serves just as well, if not better, in creating success in your business.
We view others who offer competitive products and services as our partners. And mentors. And marketing people. And research associates. And we love them for all the help they provide.
That sounds a bit strange, doesn’t it? After all, we are competing for the same clients.
So, how does that work for us?
Obviously, we watch what they do to see what works and what doesn’t. That’s just common sense.
We take it a bit further, though. We actually applaud them for the marketing they do, and the presence they create, because they’re saving us a lot of time and money.
How so? They are out there educating our future clients on the features and benefits of what we offer. They are actually laying the groundwork for us!
Here’s the perfect example of this: When I became a Web developer in 1995, I was among the first wave. I learned the skills, and understood the potential of this new medium. And for the first 6 to 7 years, I spent most of my time educating potential clients about what I was offering. It was quite a relief me when so many others entered the field and began doing the educating for me! It allowed me to finally focus on doing what I started out to do.
To this day, I am thankful for all the competition, and my business has continued to thrive through all the ups and downs as the Web has grown and matured.
As more and more people entered the field, I was challenged to be creative in making myself stand out from the crowd, to learn new skills, and to grow in all ways.
I may look like just another Web developer to you, and certainly there are many who are more skilled, have more resources and knowledge. Yet I continue to be successful - and to grow.
I attribute much of my success to the beliefs that I hold about competition:
- there are enough clients out there for everyone
- my competitors’ success is good for me and them
- as long as I focus on providing service to the best of my ability, I will be successful
Take a new look at your competitors - view them as partners - and see how that fuels your success!
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Imagination, Perspective
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