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Archive for category Insights
Let’s talk a bit more about stories today, and how they can keep us from moving forward.
Think about your average day. It’s probably filled to the brim with lots of activities.
Most of these activities, while necessary, are not, in themselves, extremely valuable in the long term. They are the small steps that all contribute to the vision that you have for your future.
Take this blog post, for example. It’s on my list of things to do today. In and of itself, I rank it’s value as pretty small. It’s primary value, at least to me, is that its a small contribution to the body of work that I am creating to accomplish my big goals. And, my day will be filled with similar activities.
At the end of the day, all the activities I’ve done will have moved me a bit further towards my goals.
Another way to look at it is that all of the activities I have done in the past have resulted in where I am and what I have achieved as of today.
Stories are much like that. They are really just the details of life. They are comprised of many small things that continue to fill our days, and the result is who we are today.
Here’s my point.
When I allow myself to be totally focused on the activities and the story (the details), of each day, I can very easily lose sight of my big goals - the reason I’m doing the activities in the first place. In the past, I have done just that (more than once), with the result that I seemed to be moving very quickly in a big circle. Which, of course, wasn’t getting me where I wanted to go very fast.
What I have learned from that is this: The activities are important. (Dreams without action don’t usually produce the results I want.)
Their importance, however, just like my story, lies in the moment of doing them, or experiencing them. Once they are past, they are only important in the results they bring, the lessons they teach, and their contribution to the whole.
The way I have learned to keep this perspective is two-fold ~ and I do this most days.
First, I let go of my story from yesterday. I write down all the parts of it that I’m still thinking about. (See Just Dump It! for more detail on this.) This helps me to let them go.
Then, I spend a little time reflecting on what I learned from yesterday, how it contributed to the overall goal, and what’s important for me to remember. I write that down as well.
So, by letting go of the details - we can make mental space and time for the important stuff - like making progress. . .
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Perspective
Stories…we all have one.
All the things you have done. All the things that have happened in your life. All the things you’ve witnessed, or heard about. This is your story.
And every day we add to our story.
Many of us think of ourselves as being defined by our story. We’ve spent most of our time there, and it’s how we’re used to interacting.
Let me explain what I mean by that.
Here’s my story from yesterday:
I got up early, after not having enough sleep, and drove to my niece Sandra’s house. I spent most of the day with her and my sister Denise. We had a yard sale which was very successful. We sat under a large shade tree for most of the time, and talked and met some interesting people who stopped by. We sold the majority of what we had. About 4:00 I left there and met Mitch at Barrett Commons AMC. We saw a new release called “Moon”, which we enjoyed. Then we went home, had dinner, and relaxed for the evening.
That’s my story (the very short version) from just yesterday.
Was there anything there that was interesting to you? Was there anything there that remains relevant for me today? Answering for myself, I’d say “no.”
The facts about what I did are a part of my story, but they were only relevant in the moment.
What might be still relevant to me are the less tangible things about yesterday. How the experience(s) made me feel. Any insights or knowledge that I gained. Anything that might be useful to me - or to other people - today or in the future.
So, here’s another version of my yesterday - without the story:
 I enjoy times when I relax and become fully engaged in where I am, who I’m with, and just “go with the flow.” It’s a refreshing change to most of my days. I think I’d like to create more time in my life for just “being.” I’d be happier if I took some of pressure of always “doing” off of myself. I laugh more and generally feel better when I do that. I also liked the movie - it was an interesting concept.
Those two things I choose to hold on to. They are relevant to me today, and perhaps even to you. (There were some other little pieces of information and insights that I think might be interesting to certain other people, but you get the idea.)
The point of all this is that if I spend part of today either thinking or talking about my story from yesterday, I’m not present today - I’m living in my past. (And, I just may be boring other people in the process.)
Rather than that, if I spend some time today thinking and talking about the insights I gained, I can perhaps inspire myself - and someone else - to act on them.
So, when someone asks me, “How was your weekend?”, my response will generally be the latter description, or at least the part of it that I think might be relevant to them.
And, when I reflect on my weekend, I choose to think of it in those terms. It just seems more productive to do it that way, because I choose to be - and share - something other than my story…
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Perspective, Relationship
This week we have been increasing our awareness about our long-standing beliefs and how they influence the way we live our lives.
To recap - many of our beliefs became a part of who we are at a very young age. They usually operate behind the scenes at a subconscious level and show up as things we feel we should or should not do. These Shoulds become very strong influences when we decide to step out and try new things and behaviors.
We initially adopted our Shoulds because they were accepted guidelines that were supposed to help us live a “good life.” This was all well and good for “then.”
But, what about now?
As you have grown and changed – and as the world around you has changed (dramatically, I might add!)– some of those beliefs have become roadblocks that can stop you from creating the success and life that you want.
In fact, when you are very determined that you want to accomplish something – and you just can’t quite seem to make headway in that direction, this is a clue that a Should is operating in the background!
Now, if you see a Should as an immovable force in your life…it actually becomes an excuse that you use to hold yourself back.
Here’s another way to look at this…Is it possible that believing that you will always be a certain way because you have always been that way, has become an excuse for not going for what you want?
If you feel this is possible, and if you want to make quicker and easier progress in creating success, it is important that you change your thinking so that you can let go of your excuses. One way to do this is to modify your beliefs and your Shoulds so that they serve you better right now.
We began to work on this yesterday by suggesting you take a conscious look at some of the Shoulds you have become aware of this week and asking, “Is this belief still true for me and who I am now?”
Did you find that some of your Shoulds no longer make logical sense when you consider who you are and what you want to do now? If you did, you can begin to loosen your grip on this belief by restating it in a way that puts some space between the past – when you adopted this belief – and the present.
Here’s an example that will show you how to do this.
Say you have the following belief: “I am not good at math.”
Now see how this next statement feels: “Until recently, I was not good at math.”
Doesn’t that feel tons better? By adding “Until recently…” to the beginning of any belief that no longer serves you, you move that old belief into the past, opening the door to experiencing it’s opposite in the present! Pretty cool, huh?
Give this a try whenever you think or say a negative statement about yourself. Just say or think it again adding until recently to the beginning of the statement.
When you approach a Should with a new “now” perspective, you create possibilities. You begin to lift the weight off that belief and feel energized by the possibility that you can now do something to move forward!
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Perspective, Possibility Exercise
In our last Grease for the Gears, we introduced you to the Shoulds - the beliefs we have about what we should or should not do. Today we are going to look at a great way to evaluate our Shoulds to see if they serve us or not.
First, let’s talk a little more about Shoulds and where they come from. Shoulds are not inherently good or bad. Actually they can make our lives much more manageable by sorting information and making certain decisions for us without taking up our conscious thinking time that we need for other activities.
Yet, Shoulds can also sneak up on us. Because they are beliefs we have “adopted” and they are primarily unconscious, they often function as an internal autopilot that determines our direction and actions without us being aware of it.
Hmmm…. this makes me wonder. How much of what we do on a daily basis is determined by our Shoulds? And how do we know when we are operating on our Should autopilot?
Actually, it is easier than you think! Even though our Shoulds are mostly unconscious, they are also very literal! To become aware when you are under the influence of a Should, listen to what you say and what you are thinking. If we listen, Shoulds clearly identify themselves by actually using the word should or shouldn’t in their instructions to us.
Now, here’s how you can use the literal nature of the Shoulds to help you evaluate them and determine if any particular Should serves you and matches up with who you are here and now.
When you hear yourself saying (or thinking) I should or I shouldn’t… STOP and ask yourself this question…
“Whose voice is that anyway?”
Why is this a good question? Somewhere, sometime, someone taught you this Should. They probably said this Should over and over to you– essentially downloading their beliefs from their autopilot to yours.
But, what worked for them may be holding you back from living your definition of success.
Once you identify a Should, you can decide if it reflects your voice – or somebody else’s.
When you evaluate what’s in your autopilot and consciously choose your beliefs, you will be amazed at how what you prefer to create and your results line up much more quickly and easily.
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness Exercise
We’ve been talking about Noise this week - external and internal noise.
We talked about the challenges of being heard by your prospective clients above the noise.
Today, let’s talk about the challenges of hearing yourself above the noise.
In this noisy and busy world, we have become almost constant communicators. We spend much of our time either speaking, writing, listening and reading. We are surrounded by words from many sources.
Let me say here that I LOVE words! I love finding just the right ones to express exactly what I feel. I love word games…well, you get the point.
Words are wonderful!
However.
Sometimes they get in the way.
Since they are really symbols of things, they require translation. The word “happy” is not happiness, but just a symbol of that state of mind. When you hear someone say “I’m happy,” you must translate that into your understanding of the feeling they are expressing. Of course this happens automatically, and very quickly, and you don’t really notice the effort it takes.
It does take mental effort, however.
If, on the other hand, someone looks at you with a huge smile, you get the same information - and probably more - in a much more direct way. You immediately understand, and even feel, their emotion without translation.
When we take words out of the communication, we recieve it more directly - and with less effort.
You may know this, and can probably think of examples very easily.
What you may not know, is what we have discovered in our Imagination Lab. Many of our exercises are done in silence. And the result is a truly amazing increase in the creativity and clarity that partipants experience.
Even in group activities which require the participants to communicate with each other, such as preparing a meal together, become totally new experiences when words are not allowed.
Creativity increases dramatically - and, almost as a bonus, it’s also more fun!
The next time you are playing with your imagination, or looking to inspire creativity (especially with someone else or a group), try it without words. You might be surprised at the results!
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Awareness Exercise, Imagination
Here in the US we are getting ready to celebrate the Fourth of July - Independence Day - the noisiest of all of our holidays. July Fourth is all about celebrating with loud marching music, firecrackers and fireworks as from coast to coast people gather together and honor the “founding” of the United State of America.
July Fourth is a great example of what can happen when a group of people is committed to an innovative idea. Back in 1776, the founding fathers were willing to be different. They were willing to take an idea and turn it into something real. And, most important, they were willing to take a stand for something they believed in.
And, because of this, they stood out from the crowd. They are remembered for their courage, determination and dedication. And they began a movement that changed the world as they knew it at the time.
So, how does this apply to you and rising above the Noise Factor? Well, I believe one of the keys to the founding fathers’ success is that they not only took actions, they took those actions based on a strong foundation made of bottom-line beliefs, like freedom, independence and basic human rights.
And when you have a solid foundation to stand on, choices about directions, priorities, and actions are easier to make.
So, what do you take a stand for? What is the foundation on which you have built your business? As you think about how your business offer is unique and how you can express that uniqueness, is there a basic ideal or vision that guides you?
Today, let’s take a look at your business foundation. Instead of thinking of actions you can take to stand out from the Noise Factor, let’s look at what you are actually taking a stand for.
First, read the following sentence and fill in the blank with the first thing that pops into your head.
Through my business, I _________________________________________.
Is what you put in the blank something that you believe in strongly? Is this really the foundation for your business? Or is it something you have adopted in response to today’s business climate and/or because of what others are doing?
Now, think about what you really want to take a stand for. What is it that you want your clients and customers to “get” about you and your business?
Sit with this for a moment. Then fill in the blank in the following sentence.
Through my business, I take a stand for ___________________________.
Every once in a while during the next several days, read this second sentence. Does it communicate what you want to give your clients and customers? Does it feel “good” to you? Can you easily relate this statement to what you are doing in your business?
If so, then this foundation is serving you right now for where you are in your business. And, as with all things, it may change as you and your business grow and evolve.
One more really cool thing…
When you consistently focus on the foundation on which your business stands, you naturally express those values in your dealings with other people, decisions are easier to make, and you get better results.
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness, Awareness Exercise, Priority
Welcome to Tuesday!
Calling all Creative Men and Imagination Women!
This week is all about making you and your business stand out from the Noise Makers. (See yesterday’s Grease for the Gears if you are wondering what we are talking about!) We are going to coach you on ways to use your creativity to find your unique offer and voice that will attract your customer and clients to you.
Cool, huh?
Now, before we get down to tools and techniques that will help you to stand out and be heard, we are going to spend a moment with you! That’s right, you! Today is all about YOU!
Why?
Because you and your innate, unique creativity are your greatest resources for building a successful business and a satisfying life. And, in order to be able to listen to yourself and to be aware of your creative thoughts and insights, you have to be able to hear them when they pop into your head!
So, today, we are going to show you a very easy technique to clear some room in your head to make way for creativity!
Here’s a little review of some concepts from yesterday plus a little more information to ponder before we give you a great exercise!
You are inundated all day, every day, with millions of messages and communications and external stimuli. You filter out most of these messages at an unconscious level.
Yet there are many messages that get caught in your conscious mind. They swirl around as a constant inner dialog that is talking at you from inside your head. To be able to get in touch with your creative thoughts and ideas, we need to make some room in that wonderful brain of yours and get it to stop talking for a few minutes.
The best way we know to do this is the Mind Dump (fondly and creatively named because it is a way to dump all those things out of your mind that are swirling around and talking at you!)
The easiest way to understand the Mind Dump is to just do it (all due respect to Nike)! So, grab some paper and something to write with and let’s give it a whirl.
When I say, “GO,” start to write whatever is in your head on the piece of paper in front of you. Write as quickly as you can. Write for a minimum of 10 minutes. Don’t edit. Don’t worry about making sense. No one will ever read this. This is just for you and you can do whatever you want with what you write when you are done. (Shredding is a great idea!)
Keep writing until you feel ready to stop. Then write for one more minute. Then stop.
Are you ready? Set…GO!
Don’t read this now – go ahead – write!
OK !!! Well done!
You have just experienced your first Mind Dump!
Now, is your internal noise a little bit quieter? Do you feel like you have some extra room in your grey matter? Do you think you will hear a creative thought when it pops up?
Good, then the Mind Dump has served its purpose.
One thing we have discovered…creative thoughts love it when you clear a path for them. They have just been waiting for the right moment when they knew they could get your attention.
Just Imagine That!
Tags: Awareness Exercise
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